We all had those child diseases of public presentation, being shy and insecure. Then you grow up, learn a few things and plung into the business world. You stumble numerous times, fail on many occasions. What you take away from these experiences and how you turn these things into a positive thing, that is art.
For me, to be the star is about being –SELF, that is to have:
Self confidence
Self respect
Self awareness
Self esteem
Your human SELF
When I learned that the most precious thing I bring is MYSELF, I started having positive feedback. I enter the center like I own the place, still humble and polite. I am not afraid to ask basic things and to make a mild joke with the hostess (am I the first/last one to come, weather, traffic – the usual conversation that shows you are a human being). I make sure and give myself time to look around the place as much as I need, if there is no host to point me to my seat to see who is there.
I didn’t come to catch a train, I am there to socialize. Self respect is somewhere here – don’t be modest, you deserve it.
Usually there are a lot of people that I don’t know. Simplyrely on those people you know, shine, smile and you will be introduced. Something I started doing at job interviews gave me a boost everywhere. I am not the one who is begging for atention – I am sure I am the one you want (to talk to, to
work with...). Don’t be full of yourself, you are not that good. But those who are self confident are the ones everyone wants to be around. Self confidence it is.
Yes, I did get dressed completely wrong. Do not mention it to anyone, they have already seen, if not said it. When your mouth opens, your true value will be reckognized. If you are dressed too serious, involve humour in the conversation. If you are not dressed serious enough, try to have a shy
smile and have a serious look, involve into serious conversations. Remember – your biggest value at the event is YOU.
Both situations happened to me. In the first case I went tothe funniest guy of all who made a comment –joke about my shoes, I responded with equal humour and the ice was broken. In the second case, one of the top managers made a mild negative comment when I appeared on the event for 200 people. So I put my smile on and started approaching our business partners, asking about work and success they had working with the company with the emphasys on me. In both cases I got comments that I was shining and that I was astonishing. So I guess that selfawareness is a must here – YOU and only YOU.
Be special, be different. The conversations could go fromwork to sports, hobbies, cooking. As all advisors for getting a job say, it is important for people to know that you have something other than work. Same in socializing – do you only know math, graphs, charts and financial news? You must have read something, seen a movie, went skiing – anything? People work all month, year, and then you come after all that and want more work. Relax, they know that you are with them because you deserved it at some point. Your self esteem coud make the story of the nail polish ruined on one finger super fun (not that I advise that you try it). You don't have your business cards? They couldn't fit in the purse anyway - if somebody wants you, they will find you in no time.
After all the etiquecy and politeness and talking andc orrecting errors you made, you have shown at some point that you are not a robot. Everybody spills drinks, breaks bottles or glaces, food drops or runs away from the plate. Keep calm, call your human self and act like it happened in your own house. The house didn’t fall and nobody died, so it’s ok. It is not a bad thing that it happened to you unless you admit it.
Keep all these –SELFs and your mind together and you’ll be the star.
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